(This is a long post so you might not able to read it all, considering the literacy rate of this forum. Ctrl+F "Karl" "Squiggles" "Conservative" "Tabby" "MGSB" or "Juq" to skip to one immediately)

Has this ever happened to YOU!?

"I don't know how to argue irrationally..."

"I HATE making valid points!"

"Analysing points in a coherent way is BORING"

Well look no further! With this simple guide, you'll never argue in a smart way ever again.

Here's our first lecturer named "KarlGoldberg674".

1) Make a wild assertion

"The kikes run the media"

2) Link a really dodgy image / website



3) Declare logical fallacy on anyone that attempts to prove you wrong

"ad hominem goy"
"strawmanning so hard goy"
"on the bandwagon like the other goyyim, goy"
"burden of proof lies on you goy"
"another appeal to emotion you beta goy"

4) Avoid questions

"it is self-evident"
"how can you not know this?"
"i have kek'd"
"toppest of keks"

5) Give up? Just meme.

"ooga booga ackbar"
"umayyad goy?"
"cucking so hard"
"*tips fedora*"

---

Hope you learned a good lesson from our first lecturer! Here is our next one: Squiggles.

1) Ask a painfully stupid question

"Do you like the colour of coffee?"

2) Answer your own question before anyone else can.

"I like the colour of coffee :)"

3) To anyone that responds calmly, use Squiggles phrases.

"I have truly DOMINATED this thread, haven't I?"
"It is official. I really like coffee."
"I have come to the conclusion that I am the most dexterous forum-poster."
"Hello, "[player name]" do you want to play on "Coffee Cup and Airplanes?"

4) To people that insult you, use Squiggles phrases

"I am not an "Ooga booga ackbar". So don't lie.
"Don't exacerbate the forum."
"It is official. You are an apostate."
"I may have to excoriate you. That is a conundrum."
"Remove your profile pic."

5) Want to make a point? Start preaching!

"It is the will of ALLAH to CIRCUMCISE the APOSTATES and INFIDELS."

6) And after this, cite the Qur'an."

"We know what the earth diminishes of them, and with Us is a retaining record." - 50:4

"So your Lord poured upon them a scourge of punishment." - 89:13

7) If anyone really annoys you, either spam their mailbox or the entire forum.
"
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
ARE YOU READY FOR A FULL SCALE SPAM ATTACK?
I think I'll just go half-scale now...
I think I'll just go half-scale now...
I think I'll just go half-scale now...
I think I'll just go half-scale now...
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
"Fizzer" was last seen 15 minutes ago... Heh heh....
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
I AM TOO PERSISTENT.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"

---

Now that was a lot. Moving onto our next lecturer, The Conservative!

1) Rehearse talking points.

"The free market economy is the one true possible system."
"I wish Ronald Reagan and George Washington were my parents..."

2) Woah! Slow down there; make the grammar broken!

"THE FREE market, economy. Is the only true posible system.."
"i WISH ronald Reagan and George washington we're my parents......"

3) Have really inconsistent random headlines that are in all caps

"THE BENEFITS OF THE FREE MARKET"
"MY TOP 5 PRESIDENTS IN THE UNITED STATES HISTORY EVER"
"WHO WON THE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE?"

4) Pretend to know what you're talking about by making your posts long as fuck

"THE BENEFITS OF THE FREE MARKET...

THE FREE market, economy. Is the only true posible system..
[link back to a childhood story]
[say how this is somehow relevant to your point]
[cite a statistic from Business Insider]
[mention Persian heritage]
[declare a logical fallacy]
[denounce the other side completely]
[mention how you're a left-wing conservative progressive libertarian]
[say how that's relevant to the statement]
[say the statement once again]

5) Almost done! Now insult someone you don't like to guarantee a response.

"and to be honest, Xapy is just showing his stupidity again"
"Ox, your a commie.... we get IT."
"now PAUgers is just bieng racist again tbhh"
"IM THE BEST DEBATOR XD"

6) Finally, link blog

"HEY GUIZ CHECK OUT MY BLOG ITS CALLED THE NEW ONION PLEASE SUBSCRIBE"

---

Next, we have Tabby!

1) Actually make a semi-smart statement.

"I think STEM should be promoted."

2) Link it to Felidae

"Felidae supports STEM!"
"Meow! Felinism advocates for STEM subjects to be taught more in schools."
"STEM has to be shown to more people. Meow."
"The parts of America with high STEM job pools are the (Oy vey!) best parts. Meow!"

3) We have lots of things to link it to. As a package, here: Judaism, Wahhabi Entity, Felinism, anti-sex, Individualism

"Meow! Israel supports STEM subjects. Jews are nice :-)"
"The Wahhabi Entity is not STEM-supporting. I do not like them. Meow."
"Felinism is a great Individualist ideology which supports STEM!"
"(Oy vey!) Sex is not good, because thanks to STEM, we can reproduce without it!"

4) Now mention the CIN conspiracy

"The enemies of STEM are all either Caninist, Islamists, or Nazis. Any rational thinker should hate the CIN coalition!"

5) Victimise yourself

"The CIN Coalition are out to KILL ME! Nazis are accepted here, Islamists are accepted here, Caninists are accepted here. You conforming bullies! I am not accepted here.

Oh well, I don't mind. Meow"

6) Mention how you're better than everyone else

"I don't need the approval of Caninists. Meow! I get enough attention in my real life to not need you Islamists insulting me. I do not mind, though. Please keep slating me."

7) Make sure your posts are twice as long as Conservative's

[goes over character limit]

8) Top it off with a "Meow!" ":-)" or "Oy vey!"

self evident

---

That was cancerous! Now, MGSB.

1) Make a thread with huge clickbait

"Bernie The Bomber supporters... Read this"
"Who killed more? The Nazis, or Hillary?"
"You're over, statists."

2) Recite your talking points

"The biggest killer in the world is the state"
"The free market allows people to improve their lives!"
"Anarchy has hugely improved Somalia"
"Controlled economies like Norway have a GDP lower than Mississippi"

3) If people call you out on them, cite Gary Johnson

"What's Aleppo?"

4) Then claim to dislike Gary Johnson, but just hate the system

"Fuck da system. it's not a phase mom"

5) Occasionally u̶s̶e̶ wield Anglish

"Please, may I ask you a frain?"

6) End by calling your opposition "Not real [label]"

"You're not a real socialist. You don't believe in X"
"You're not a real fascist. You don't believe in Y"
"You're not a real libertarian. You don't believe in Z"

---

Finally, the one that manages to be the most sane and insane at the same time: Juq

1) Make a thread only because the rest of the forum is too Ameri-centric

"I formed this Hangukar poll as too many folk talk about American stuff"

2) Cite Yandex

"Russian Power"

3) Link this to the nation that you currently claim to be a part of

"I saw this in Eritrea"
"I lived in Kaliningrad once..."
"When I was Nenetsian"
"I am Scottish!"
"I once was in the Jewish Oblast"
"When I lived in Anadyr"
"Kazakhstan stronk"

4) ANGLISH ANGLISH ANGLISH

3Cancerous5Me. Ask Juq about Anglish stuff.

5) Losing? Just say random shit

(next post because too long)

Edited 10/11/2016 16:42:26

It's a curseword noone should know. I've been to Kaliningrad before and it's the most commonly wielded word there.

¾

while we're on it, let's do some more marks.

Aw yeah look at this muddled up thing 響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響響

backwards Ƨ, also ƨuper cool˯˯˯

˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿˿we're going this way͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͏͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a͠a what''s hâpéning my wørd
[Edit: Comment DELETED]aaaaaaaaaaa

҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄
I got smoked out oh no
҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄҃҄А
aw yeah Cyrillish wreaths are the best kind؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁ smokestacks ҃҄҃҄҃҄w҃҄҃҄҃҄o҃҄҃҄҃҄o҃҄҃҄҃҄h҃҄҃҄҃҄o҃҄҃҄҃҄o҃҄҃҄҃҄
؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁؁
cool I got to wield this sometime as a divsisor

؟؟؟ I'm left handed

Aw yeah let's spam islaam ۞۞۞۞۞My goal is to Islaamise Warlight.۞۞۞۞۞

 ※∈l∈phants⑩⑨⑧⑩⑨⑧uh I don't know what comes after 8╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯╁┯

▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉▉
whoops got censored again said something I shouldn't have

ＳＯＭＡＬＩＡ

◤◥
◣◢

↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓is spammer warning◌◌◌



And, that's the end! Who argues the best? TELL.

*tips fedora*

All is so true. FELIDAE NEEDS TO GO ASAP

you forgot Angry Koala Grrrbllrrggggrbbblgrrrrrrrhhh!!!!!

The Juq one had me cracking. But you forgot to clean your keyboaikfuoresuiergohirsugozihsrguiohzrgiorszhgopsrghpouhrgouphrsguoprhguporghtdjtdkl,gyluygkyulykdfjjsdfttydhertha4y6t36t3546t6t6t6t6t6t6t6t6t6t6t543yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy35uij6ru6rurujhhydyhththdthgrgsrg

Im waiting for the day Kapy gets so angry he starts going full Slav on us.

Angry Koala was a man of great passion and charisma, known for his legendary and convincing viewpoints and speeches. However, he was struck down by evil, docile people who dared to see at least 10% of what the other side was advocating. These people were large in number, but those who stand out the most are Martian, the first to start his unjustified attack on Angry's way of existing, Juq, who had just returned from exile, Gen. Numbnuts at one point, and literally everyone else who wasn't Hitchslap and wct, Angry's body guards and faithful companions.

Curse all of you on this list and all of you who censored the thought process of those ahead of their time like Angry Koala. Angry best argumentator 10/10.

how karl said before:

no1currs

S O M A L I A

I appear to be missing OX...

Do that Bulgarian bloke too

Yes, the crazy Bulgarian. He said I'm not a nice person. What an idiot.

Bayern Munchen

Very good post, but for Karl:

remember to make a thread with only a title, or start off your argument in such a format:

"Scotland's a great country."

stay deluded

"I want an anglo girlfriend" - Onoma94

>racemixing (or say something else racist)

"I lived in Kazakhstan as a whiteskin fellow and the Muslims were fine there" - Juqtırw

>slav (or any needed qualifier)
>thinking he's white (or any other claim)

Step 6 "And after this, cite the Qur'an." isn't really what he does. He cites stuff from (https://islamqa.info/en).

Also, Angry Koala do him here please haha, if you forgot him, I'll let you this (https://www.warlight.net/Forum/154680-poll-arrogance) as a starting point.

Edited 10/11/2016 21:47:41

upvoted, friended, and noted as "funny"

lol

Edited 10/12/2016 01:18:00

[Censored by Fizzer]

Edited 10/12/2016 01:33:28

Quality post Ox. Gave me a few laughs.